Atha felt like she plummeted from a great height back into her seat by the fire, her stomach jolting sharply with the image of Aragibal crumbling in the desert an image so at odds with everything else she had seen of the Au Ra that it caused a stabbing pain inside her chest stealing the breath from her lungs. Her vision swam and she blinked furiously, trying to shed the sympathetic tears she could feel building against her will, her jaw clenched tight enough for her teeth to creek as she literally bit back the forlorn cries that the experience of Ara's life was trying to wrench from her.
Ara's whispered apology locks Atha up even tighter. No... somehow she had enough room to feel slowly dawning horror alongside the sympathetic heartbreak. Whatever this thing that happened is, it must have shown him that. Air hisses past her teeth in increasing speed, her breath shortening and fear and anger started to fight as her response.
Before she can do anything else, she finds herself being wrenched away into another memory-
Athala was concerned. Mummy was Ill. Which she knew had happened before, there was that one winter when Mummy got all hot and red in the face and she seemed to do was sneeze and blow her nose, and she had explained to Athala that, ‘There are many ways people can be ill, some are more serious than others.’ Athala wasn’t stupid, no matter what Oerid said about her not being smart because she didn’t know her letters even though she was almost five Suns old. She could wait to learn, Mummy was so busy with work that she didn’t have the time and Athala knew that Work was Important because Work meant there was Money which meant you could Buy Food, and Athala like the food Mummy made so she could wait a little longer for letter lessons…
Anyroad she wasn’t stupid! And because she wasn’t stupid, Athala knew that Mummy was Seriously Ill. Afterall, if it wasn’t serious she would be better by now, just like that winter. But Mummy had been poorly for a lot of weeks now and that was Not Good. Mummy hadn’t been able to go to Work which meant no new Money which meant no Food. Her Mummy was also clever and she had set aside some gil but Athala was very aware that there was not much of that left, and it wasn’t too difficult for her to understand that Not Having Food was a Bad Thing
“Athala...come here...” Athala turned away from the window, she hated Mummy being Ill, she wasn’t herself. She sounded so quiet all the time now, and she was tired, and she didn’t look like herself. Mummy was tall, and strong, and her skin was always warm and tanned. Ill Mummy was pale and slightly yellow-coloured, she was cold to touch, and she looked Small even though she was still bigger than Athala, her amazing muscles were gone and her skin looked ...baggy.
Mummy slept a lot these days which was no fun, 'cause Mummy played with her whenever she wasn’t working but that had stopped around the time Mummy has stopped her Job... Athala plonked herself on the floor next to the head of the thin straw mattress, the only one that lay on the floor of their mostly empty one-room house. Not that they needed more room, Athala never understood why people needed more than one room, what did people do with all that empty space?
“My beautiful girl...you’re getting so big and beautiful…”
Athala grinned at that, “That’s because I look like you Mummy, and you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” She grins as Mummy starts to laugh, Athala truly is proud that she looked like Mummy, from her nose to her eyes to her hair they were the same, although that grin dies as Mummy’s laughter turns to coughing, Athala’s small hand moving to rub Mummy’s back.
“Athala sweetie...I have a surprise for you...” Mummy pats her lap, and Athala happily shuffles onto if, settling in as once-strong arms now chilly and emaciated wrap around her in a hug. “Close your eyes and do not look until I tell you.”
“Yes Mummy!” Athala does as she is told, sighing happily as she feels Mummy start to slowly, and gently untangle her hair before slowly braiding it. The silence is comfortable, broken only by Mummy’s occasional coughing. “There...open your eyes...”
Athala does so and gasps, hands darting up to her hair and gently feeling it to see if there was more like the plait that had fallen in to view, green glass bead at the end. She could feel them in her hair, eight short braids, exactly like Mummy’s hair! Athala spins in Mummy's lap and hugs her as tightly as she can manage, “Now I really do look like you Mummy, I love them!”
“I’m glad...you look even more beautiful. Now...come cuddle with Mummy...tell me about your day.” Athala let Mummy lie down, before snuggling in next to her, ignoring how cold the cuddle felt compared to Before Mummy was Ill, and then starts chattering away excitedly, telling Mummy exactly what she thought about snotty Oerid, and about the fun she had had had finding this little nook not that far from the house...
. . .
It isn’t for a good while that Athala realises that the room is unnaturally quiet, the only sound she could hear was her own breathing. Which was confusing, she had her head tucked up on Mummy’s chest so why couldn’t she hear the slow beat of her heart, and Mummy felt even colder than Ill Mummy... Athala pushes herself up, “Mummy?” She asks quietly as she looks at Mummy’s face. Her eyes were closed and there was a small smile on her face...Athala gives Mummy a gentle shake. “Mummy?!” Athala’s heart starts to thump faster in her chest, the noise deafening in the quiet of the house, Mummy always woke up when she called.
Athala places her hands back on Mummy’s chest, but she couldn’t feel the thumping heart. Mummy had said something important about the heart, but what?
Oh.
Athala stares down at Mummy and starts to sniffle as she touches the beads in her hair, her chest felt tight and her skin warm and her eyes stung. Mummy...Mummy had been Serious Ill... Mummy...The feelings were too much, Athala felt like she might burst, something had to give. And it did, a keening, broken wail started to echo off of the walls of the room. Athala couldn’t stop, she was being Naughty, this was going to Disturb the Neighbours but she couldn’t stop, her cries shuddered but carried on.
Athala didn’t know how long it was till she managed to stop crying, but it was dark outside. Which meant that she had been especially Naughty making all that noise. Mummy always had her go out for a little while if the neighbours were angry, telling her to come back to her in a few hours. So she needed to leave, it’s what Mummy said to do and Mummy Knows Best. But...she couldn’t go back to Mummy, Mummy...Mummy wasn’t here anymore. Athala felt cold and small as she made her way towards the room’s only door, she cracked the door open and stepped out, sniffling as she glanced back at Mummy lying in Not Sleep in bed. She pulls the door closed Quietly and steps away, numb and cold as she sneaks away from the house...
Tw: Minor Character Death
Ara's whispered apology locks Atha up even tighter. No... somehow she had enough room to feel slowly dawning horror alongside the sympathetic heartbreak. Whatever this thing that happened is, it must have shown him that. Air hisses past her teeth in increasing speed, her breath shortening and fear and anger started to fight as her response.
Before she can do anything else, she finds herself being wrenched away into another memory-
Athala was concerned. Mummy was Ill. Which she knew had happened before, there was that one winter when Mummy got all hot and red in the face and she seemed to do was sneeze and blow her nose, and she had explained to Athala that, ‘There are many ways people can be ill, some are more serious than others.’ Athala wasn’t stupid, no matter what Oerid said about her not being smart because she didn’t know her letters even though she was almost five Suns old. She could wait to learn, Mummy was so busy with work that she didn’t have the time and Athala knew that Work was Important because Work meant there was Money which meant you could Buy Food, and Athala like the food Mummy made so she could wait a little longer for letter lessons…
Anyroad she wasn’t stupid! And because she wasn’t stupid, Athala knew that Mummy was Seriously Ill. Afterall, if it wasn’t serious she would be better by now, just like that winter. But Mummy had been poorly for a lot of weeks now and that was Not Good. Mummy hadn’t been able to go to Work which meant no new Money which meant no Food. Her Mummy was also clever and she had set aside some gil but Athala was very aware that there was not much of that left, and it wasn’t too difficult for her to understand that Not Having Food was a Bad Thing
“Athala...come here...” Athala turned away from the window, she hated Mummy being Ill, she wasn’t herself. She sounded so quiet all the time now, and she was tired, and she didn’t look like herself. Mummy was tall, and strong, and her skin was always warm and tanned. Ill Mummy was pale and slightly yellow-coloured, she was cold to touch, and she looked Small even though she was still bigger than Athala, her amazing muscles were gone and her skin looked ...baggy.
Mummy slept a lot these days which was no fun, 'cause Mummy played with her whenever she wasn’t working but that had stopped around the time Mummy has stopped her Job... Athala plonked herself on the floor next to the head of the thin straw mattress, the only one that lay on the floor of their mostly empty one-room house. Not that they needed more room, Athala never understood why people needed more than one room, what did people do with all that empty space?
“My beautiful girl...you’re getting so big and beautiful…”
Athala grinned at that, “That’s because I look like you Mummy, and you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” She grins as Mummy starts to laugh, Athala truly is proud that she looked like Mummy, from her nose to her eyes to her hair they were the same, although that grin dies as Mummy’s laughter turns to coughing, Athala’s small hand moving to rub Mummy’s back.
“Athala sweetie...I have a surprise for you...” Mummy pats her lap, and Athala happily shuffles onto if, settling in as once-strong arms now chilly and emaciated wrap around her in a hug. “Close your eyes and do not look until I tell you.”
“Yes Mummy!” Athala does as she is told, sighing happily as she feels Mummy start to slowly, and gently untangle her hair before slowly braiding it. The silence is comfortable, broken only by Mummy’s occasional coughing. “There...open your eyes...”
Athala does so and gasps, hands darting up to her hair and gently feeling it to see if there was more like the plait that had fallen in to view, green glass bead at the end. She could feel them in her hair, eight short braids, exactly like Mummy’s hair! Athala spins in Mummy's lap and hugs her as tightly as she can manage, “Now I really do look like you Mummy, I love them!”
“I’m glad...you look even more beautiful. Now...come cuddle with Mummy...tell me about your day.” Athala let Mummy lie down, before snuggling in next to her, ignoring how cold the cuddle felt compared to Before Mummy was Ill, and then starts chattering away excitedly, telling Mummy exactly what she thought about snotty Oerid, and about the fun she had had had finding this little nook not that far from the house...
.
.
.
It isn’t for a good while that Athala realises that the room is unnaturally quiet, the only sound she could hear was her own breathing. Which was confusing, she had her head tucked up on Mummy’s chest so why couldn’t she hear the slow beat of her heart, and Mummy felt even colder than Ill Mummy... Athala pushes herself up, “Mummy?” She asks quietly as she looks at Mummy’s face. Her eyes were closed and there was a small smile on her face...Athala gives Mummy a gentle shake. “Mummy?!” Athala’s heart starts to thump faster in her chest, the noise deafening in the quiet of the house, Mummy always woke up when she called.
Athala places her hands back on Mummy’s chest, but she couldn’t feel the thumping heart. Mummy had said something important about the heart, but what?
Oh.
Athala stares down at Mummy and starts to sniffle as she touches the beads in her hair, her chest felt tight and her skin warm and her eyes stung. Mummy...Mummy had been Serious Ill... Mummy...The feelings were too much, Athala felt like she might burst, something had to give. And it did, a keening, broken wail started to echo off of the walls of the room. Athala couldn’t stop, she was being Naughty, this was going to Disturb the Neighbours but she couldn’t stop, her cries shuddered but carried on.
Athala didn’t know how long it was till she managed to stop crying, but it was dark outside. Which meant that she had been especially Naughty making all that noise. Mummy always had her go out for a little while if the neighbours were angry, telling her to come back to her in a few hours. So she needed to leave, it’s what Mummy said to do and Mummy Knows Best. But...she couldn’t go back to Mummy, Mummy...Mummy wasn’t here anymore. Athala felt cold and small as she made her way towards the room’s only door, she cracked the door open and stepped out, sniffling as she glanced back at Mummy lying in Not Sleep in bed. She pulls the door closed Quietly and steps away, numb and cold as she sneaks away from the house...